career of my dreams! wherefore art thou?
Romeo and Juliet, for what reason are they celebrated? It’s not because their families were feuding. It’s not because they died. It’s because of what transpired while they lived.
In all the danger and sweetness of conspiracy, had either Romeo or Juliet failed to show up for their meetings in secret because one was busy, fearful or because one or the other experienced trepidations there would have been no passion. No romance. No drama. Nothing to celebrate. In fact there would be no story to tell.
Their story is notable however because they brought each other alive.
And finding, designing or creating the career of your dreams isn’t so different.
You meet with your desire – even if it is in secret. You show up. You make plans. You may even tell a few souls sworn to absolute secrecy who support you. You do this even if all of the authorities (those loud voices either in your head or in your life) conspire against you. Simply because it brings you alive and makes you want to be alive.
You cannot lead with your head alone. Career bliss just doesn’t work like that.
The form that career bliss takes exists and begins as a mystery, very much like the unfolding of a love story that draws two people together seeking self-expression through being with the other. In the beginning its’ form is unknown and the steps en route uncharted. It’s interesting how it’s not necessary or even desirable to be led with certainty because you are willing go wherever it takes you. You accept the journey.
But here’s a mis-think that you often come across on your journey. It stops you in your tracks: That the path to the career of your dreams is about doing what you love. Me thinks not.
Look closer. Feel more deeply. Check for accuracy. And be impeccable with your words:
We are notorious for dis-allowing ourselves pleasure and to do what you love would be a constant pleasure. One that feels guilty to engage in. One that you’re conditioned to stay away from because it’s selfish. And while we want to think that a bit of selfishness is a good thing (as opposed to giving ourselves away to anyone or anything that asks), these sentiments do not endure. They give no lasting strength. They speak not to the core of who you are.
To hear this advice and think that this is what must be done can create a great deal of inner turmoil when attempted: You may meet your desire once or twice or seldom or on occasion, but you will not sustain the romance needed to open to passion without consistency. For that to happen you must meet your match – that’s real career bliss. For you already know that you would never reveal completely to someone who would feel guilty for being close to you. You would never really follow through with someone who fought with their desire to be with you. And you would be right not to.
What are you doing when you truly court the romance of career bliss that feels worthy of the efforts and energy the likes of Romeo and Juliet had for their perilous relationship?
You are actively and consciously loving who you are.
Only when you love yourself can you ever really allow yourself to love what you love. Only then can you follow through with the journey that feels rightfully yours. Take the risks that are yours to take. Have the doors open that are waiting for you. Only then.
Loving who you are keeps the embers glowing and growing (just like Romeo and Juliet who kept showing up for each other) until the passion is ignited and partners with you. Love the being-ness of yourself and co-create with your life, not in spite of it. This enduring love begets more love and is the stuff that resilience is made of. It has a ritual. It is a ritual. In fact, it is a rite of passage. When you show up for it – this career bliss that you long for – will reveal itself to you.
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