Life has provided you with so many reasons to …
… not share your real self
… avoid your truth
… build your life around security alone
… work because “you have to”
… keep your dreams a secret (even from yourself)
… compare your “progress” to others
… and worst of all, to not believe in yourself.

So I’m here to write and share and facilitate and teach about how to connect with the lost parts of yourself so that you can learn to create and sustain a meaningful life.

What that really means is that in the capacity of a Career Counselor, I work with you to articulate yourself with clarity and confidence in navigating the world of work with savour-faire. I help you to believe in yourself again.

For you, what that means is that work doesn’t have to feel like a sore thumb in your life that requires you to be a different person than you are in other parts of your life. You can feel whole and work without burnout.

If you’re in a leadership role or want to take on the leadership role in your life, consider yourself a professional in your field, are under 40 (or thereabouts) and don’t feel fulfilled by the career that you worked so hard for, this is the place for you. I work with people like you and teach them how to navigate their career feeling like themselves.

To stay in touch, I invite you to fill out the tiny form on the right so that we can rendez-vous in your inbox from time to time. And below is where the library of articles begins (you’ll always be the first to get them if you’re on my very confidential list + some more private messages about what’s going on behind the scenes).

My services are listed here, the digital course I made that tackles career disappointment is here, and if you want to write to me, you can do that here.

Make yourself at home. My virtual home is always here for you. xo

trying times call for compassionate measures

During a pandemic, it’s easy to see that we are in this for the long-haul. But what this time can reveal is that our entire life is the true meaning of long-haul. Though it was too distracting to really acknowledge that before this “hell must’ve frozen over” and “pigs must be flying” moment in the earth’s history lasting at least a couple of birthdays now for many.

I don’t know how you have been coping with this time nor do I don’t know how you’ve been feeling through this. And I don’t know what you’ve been missing or desiring that has made this time feel difficult, but I imagine that the feelings have been experienced as more prominent than in the past.

To speak of my own experience is to say that it has been a time of engaging with a certain unfamiliar wilderness inside of myself as I simultaneously witness events and pain that range from sad to devastating. And of course there’s been everything in between. Moments of love, kindness, joy. Frustration, annoyance and celebrations of life in ways that have all required a new etiquette in human interaction to meet our needs with those we care for near and far whether we know them personally or not.

It has been a time that is both trying as well as an honour to be human. The effects will be revealed for decades to come whatever your personal experience has been within the context of the collective. This has been a time of intensity in emotions and trying to put words to things that are new experiences that unpack some old and familiar feelings. Whatever your experience, we are each going about our day as human. Which is what frustrates us most about being human. Especially when very little might feel or look or sound ideal.

When it was the past, perhaps you found yourself wanting something different. And now that the past is the past and the future looks like more of this same (for at least a little while), you might find yourself wishing for the past. This is human. And so is the ability to see this state for the opportunity that it is. As a witness to a deep human need for satisfaction without an accurate way to acknowledge what is satisfying unless and until a time is firmly in the past.

To feel satisfaction lies in how we make meaning out of all of the experiences that we have without dwelling and ruminating in ways that encourage a negative bias. In a way that is with an almost remote perspective that we feel deeply connected to. Because the funny thing about meaning is that it’s pretty invisible to the naked eye of any onlooker. It’s a deeply personal experience.

As much as anyone wants to make everything or at least some thing feel better right now, there is too much for any one of us. However it remains that the feeling of actually making or leaving something at least a bit better than you found it or creating something of meaning is the intrinsic reward of being human. We feel good when we do, no matter how small what we do is. The bigger issue at this time is to count the little in the face of so much going on. To call upon the best of what it means to be “only human” during trying times.

This call to be human though does require something of you. And that something is the cultivation of compassion. Because this time is cultivating compassion as much as it is cultivating anything else.

It is abundantly apparent at a time when everyone wants more than any one person can give that no one person can do everything. And it doesn’t cultivate compassion to focus on how you can’t do what you used to do or what you know you would be capable of in different circumstances. Remember, that’s not now. But what we can do is our part and stretch to leverage doing more with less. Like doing a little bit more for ourselves while refraining from acting unless we can do something with compassion both for ourselves an another. This means looking for things to do that you’re happy to offer that may change up, rather than eradicate what you’re currently doing now.

What you require may not necessarily be a good night’s sleep per se, but rather a heart with compassion to give. Doesn’t sound so terrible, does it? But as a practice, we humans find this very hard because we were given to from martyrs and victims of guilt who didn’t understand that this is what diminishes love rather than cultivates it. So there is a collective unlearning happening since the status quo of how we gave is brought to its knees by this time.

We have to be allowed to admit that we got how we give wrong so that we can make it right.

Compassion is only human so it is possible to give. But what is it and how can it exist in our daily life? Here are some of my ideas:

Compassion is cultivated for starters. And it has to begin with yourself. Otherwise what you give will undermine or overpower what you seek to help. Like a sun scorched or drowned plant that cannot possibly thrive.

Compassion is the willingness and ability to observe the results of your actions, rather than just being focused on what and how you want to give. This is because people really are unique. To give truly from a place of your own love with insight into your own motives. As we cannot control how others receive. And noticing whether your own actions are meeting your own needs or tinged with resentment or expectation. It’s not uncommon to want to give more to someone that would benefit from less and to undergive to another that would benefit from more. Or to consider trading what you give to whom with someone else that’s a much better match.

Compassion is a ceasing of the diminishment of the tasks of the day. A shower is not less than a meal prepared. A dog walk is not less than a floor that is swept. An email completed is not more than a table that is wiped down. Do what you’re doing that needs to be done. Stay with the task and respect the effort. If you can’t, ask yourself why.

Compassion is a rising up of willingness to listen to your own pain and to console yourself without placating. “What is” is just “what is.” It’s not better to be happy than angry. If you’re angry accept that you feel angry. Anger is not what you are. There is no need to feel guilty when you are content and in the presence of someone having a completely different experience of the same event. Be with you yourself and you’ll be there for another.

Compassion is a way of making this moment feel fully accepted so that true change can sprout and take root. Returning again and again as needed to fully accept this moment in order for clarity to set in. And then again as needed. Repeat until your last breath.

Compassion is at the very least how we stop things from getting or feeling worse.

If misery loves company, what compassion heals is suffering. With compassion, we’ll all feel and do better because we’re all human. Even when that feels like the hardest thing to do some days. It’s only human to learn to go deep, rise up, let go, and love. It’s part of any career journey worth your while.

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May 11, 2021 tagged as:

the crucible of creativity

Beyond the home of where we each reside, the anxiety of a mass drama is taking place as we are halted from progressing at our usual global speed. The earth itself, travels in space while we live as ants on it. Before the virus, during the virus, and after the virus pandemic. Life will go on…

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April 27, 2020 tagged as:

the end of work as we know it

Hi there, It’s a nice day today. It’s chilly, but the sun in shining. It looks normal outside. Spring seems to be peeking through and coming up wherever I look. A fresh green bit here. A skyward carpet of white blossoms decorating the trees. A whisper of pink still bundled up threatening to burst out…

how i cultivate creativity

Creativity is in being. And if you’re not connected to your beingness, life will always feel harder than it needs to. Time and time again, when life feels really, really hard (and it does sometimes), it’s because I’m blocked from my creativity. I can only see the thing I’m looking at one way, when what…

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April 18, 2018 tagged as:

do you think you’re lazy even though your work tires you out?

I’ve had more than a few clients, after working together for a little while, suddenly start to accuse themselves of absolute laziness. Their lives aren’t moving in the direction they want to be moving in. Even though they really want it to. In reality, they swat away the suggestions or ideas or inspirations that might…

4 ways to get calm when faced with stress at work

Work stress can be anything that creates the seed of anger within. And long-standing stress is unequivocally unhealthy even though we think of it as normal. But like many things, all that is normal, isn’t necessarily healthy. The number one way that you keep the stress loop going is by minimizing its impact on yourself,…

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October 13, 2017 tagged as: ,

when a career counselor career transitions

When I started this website and online library (I don’t like the word ‘blog’), I didn’t know what it would become. I was a Career Counselor and that’s all I knew. And then I started to write articles … about career counseling. I worked one-on-one with clients (still do) and did cameos in corporations that…

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September 17, 2017 tagged as:

5 signs you should’ve never taken that job

Job offers are seductive. You feel so rewarded for all that effort. You won. You’re the one out of all the other possible applicants that got offered the job. You even celebrated this fact with a night out, a new outfit, or a toast. But as we all know, the high of receiving the job…

the art of career storytelling (for better resumes, interviews, and self-awareness)

As you know, most people don’t like working on their resume content. The endless tinkering can feel asinine. If that’s how you feel though, you’re in the right place. Because refining resume content ought to increase, rather than decrease which is often the case, self-understanding and confidence. I think we’ve all had the experience of…

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September 23, 2016 tagged as: ,

the secret to writing unique, professional, and intriguing resume bullets

Let me guess … you don’t like resume writing. And I wouldn’t blame you. There’s a lot riding on crafting resume content. To elaborate on why this is so important, your resume content gives employers information about your self-esteem, what you get offered in the way of renumeration should you receive a job offer, in…

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