Whenever feelings and thoughts come up for you at other times, remind yourself that you will deal with them during the special allotted time. When I was 14 one of my classmates got cancer and died. I started a blog soon after my daughter was diagnosed to share our moments as a family and keep all of our friends and family that live far away updated. Now, for the tricky part. hi all woas wondering for any advice or help as I am doing my own head in. You feel pangs of jealousy. .therabh { font-size:100%!important;margin:-13px 0 0 0; } This is a kid who is mature beyond his years, well mannered, intelligent, fun, and an all around great kid (according to other adults and every teacher to date). You and your uncle tried your best but, as you say, it would not have made a difference if the medics had gotten there more quickly. It all began when 4 years ago my father fell and broke his hip at the boat yard where he stored for boat during the winter. M y name is Debbie and my story is about my father who passed away in May 2013. Like others, I have described it to people as “broken” or “fractured” English. Learn more. I'm 23 and for about 5 years I've always had a gnawing feeling in the back of my mind about dying. These are the big, important questions. I can't see myself getting married or having kids, I feel like I have this sense that I'm going to die before that. This is an absolutely normal response to a difficult death. Yes, philosophically, we all know that everyone dies. Sometimes I can't help but think how my Dad is eventually going to die, then I end up accidentally creating fake situations in my mind. Learning To Trust Yourself Again After Betrayal, Many Seniors with Depression Faring Well During Pandemic. These cookies help provide information such as metrics on the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc. Used by Google DoubleClick and stores information about how the user uses the website and any other advertisement before visiting the website. Your grandfather’s passing made the finality of death real for you. For any parent, teacher or carer, hearing a child say 'I want to kill myself' is a heart stopping moment. Everytime I drive I actually brace myself for impact when a car passes me on the opposite side of the road. It falls on us, then, to come to grips with the transient nature of life and to figure out how we want to live and love. But it is the first meaningful death we experience that makes that idea starkly real. I was definitely a "momma's boy". My father died when I was 15, and for about 20 years afterwards I dug in like a tick to any unfortunate man who would have me, refusing to move on until I was all but surgically detached. I don’t think (and I could be wrong) that this is a phobia for I am not greatly unsettled about the thought. Sharon, who lives in Lucan, Co Dublin, said Karl (Swaine), who was her first child, was born a “perfectly healthy baby” on April 2nd, 2007. “We had no concerns – he was hitting all his milestones and everything was fine,” she said. Jealous of the families who haven’t been traumatized by the death of a child. I was just like you. Please don't think you are alone, but I wasted 20yrs of my life being controlled by anxiety- not going on holiday, letting people out of my sight etc its exhausting, keep strong be kind to yrself and take each day xxxx. Constantly worried about my parents. The cookie is used to store information of how visitors use a website and helps in creating an analytics report of how the wbsite is doing. Then make sure you do it. If your child … Whenever my wife leaves the house, goes on a road trip, or if we are apart, I can’t help but thinking that she might die. These cookies do not store any personal information. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. I have had panick attacks on and off from I was 16, I'm now 28.. From last thurs I've been now getting pains in my chest, sometimes on left sometimes on right and sometimes just a tight feeling all over.. Death can never changed that. But I can’t get over the fact that there was nothing I could do. Not us. From Bangalore India: This all started when my grandpa passed away last year. This cookie is set by Youtube. I often have bad thoughts in my head telling me that I'm going to die and I have a 1yr old child that I want to be here for. My 11-year-old daughter (who is an only child) gets very upset at night when she is going to bed. ... Why does my child keep thinking every thing is going to kill her? I get a headache and I … I saw my grandpa die as they bought him home from the hospital. Is this some sign of depression? I would love to share your story. Idk what it is but it keeps telling me that something might happen to me or a … I have not yet written the process of diagnosis for us, it is extremely painful but I will before the one year anniversary. needs to be answered—even if it’s not asked. We use Google Analytics to understand how visitors interact with the website. Children hear and see way to much on TV and the computers. What day am I going to die? Therapists live, online right now, from BetterHelp: Want a more immediate answer from others like you? I love them a lot but I know someday, everybody must go. I keep thinking maybe its a sign or something. I can’t stop thinking about death. I used to struggle with thoughts of me thinking that I am dying or that I got ill very often. Everyday, when I walk home from school, I think about the ways they could die and what I would do without them. I’m sure everyone has reassured you that in no way is it your fault that the call didn’t go through. The cookie is used to calculate visitor, session, camapign data and keep track of site usage for the site's analytics report. My child died, and just as I recount stories about my living children, I still feel inclined to do so with my child who is not alive. .therab_url { color:#4C88C5; font-family:"open sans condensed",arial; text-decoration:none!important; } And my plan is to record and publish videos like this one that document my thoughts, my fears, my feelings, whatever this experiment inspires. All rights reserved. When you are ready seek help its there, its just so difficult to get something ,but keep pushing im passionate about changingxxx I have gotten into the habit of having morbid thoughts. If you can’t take time out from your responsibilities, what you can do is compartmentalize your feelings so you can function. I wasn’t in his class but everyone knew about him…ours was a very small, rural school. Constantly checking, always worried. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. Serious. Why do I feel like I’m going to die soon? But the fact that it keeps me awake at the night and enduces nightmares, I can’t seem to continue my life normally anymore. I can totally relate to that feeling. I was like this as a child. #therabb_contain::after { font-family:"open sans condensed",arial,sans-serif; font-size:70%; background:#FFF;padding:0 9px;color:#999; margin-top:-55px; content:"(S P O N S O R E D)"; right:10px;position:absolute; } This cookie is installed by Google Analytics. What caused this was my anxiety, I had very irrational thoughts around my own health and the health of the people I care about. I constantly worry about my parents and partner dying to a degree that just can't be normal. For the last couple of weeks, he has been OBSESSED that he is going to die. In young-child terms, it’s sufficiently honest to say you’re planning to live to 100, until they have children of their own, and their children have children. The ambulance rushed him to a local hospital but they wouldn't operate on him because, as the doctors said, my father's kidney and heart problems. #therabb_contain { margin:10px 0 10px 0; padding:10px; border:3px solid #4C88C5;display:block;height:100%;min-height:150px;width:90%;position:relative; } I won't walk on grating on the sidewalk. What If My Child Asks If I’m Going to Die? Idk how to control them , now I dont wanna go anywhere cause I keep thinking I'm going to die. National Centre for Inherited Metabolic Disorders, Temple Street Children’s University Hospital, Temple Street, Dublin 1, Phone: (01) 878 4317 | Email: metabolic@cuh.ie. This cookies is installed by Google Universal Analytics to throttle the request rate to limit the colllection of data on high traffic sites. Follow her on Facebook or Twitter. Help me this is taking over my life ! HELP! This cookie is set by Youtube and registers a unique ID for tracking users based on their geographical location. I've just about convinced myself that I'm going to die very soon. advice, diagnosis or treatment. She specializes in couples and family therapy and parent education. We use cookies to optimise your experience, and to enable us to understand how visitors use our website. Copyright © 1995-2020 Psych Central. “Then, in February 2009, I was changing his nappy one night and noticed his belly button stuck out.”. and now these thoughts are back. You are going through what is known in philosophy as an existential crisis. This is used to present users with ads that are relevant to them according to the user profile. I don’t feel anxious or worried, just confused. In the following seconds, time either stands still or comes rushing at you like a speed train. Even when I don't have a pain I feel like I'm constantly tensed up just thinking that something's going … :C I just keep thinking really morbid thoughts. That event makes many people question the meaning of life and the meaning of their own existence. Psych Central does not provide medical or psychological Sharon, who lives in Lucan, Co Dublin, said Karl (Swaine), who was her first child, […] Up until then, it was an abstraction. I could be on campus walking to class and if it's windy I think a tree branch is going to hit me in the head and kill me. Whether or not you openly talk about it, you can be sure that your loved ones are worrying and thinking … I have suffered with anxiety for yrs but this sort of feels different to anything I have had in the past. The cookies store information anonymously and assigns a randoly generated number to identify unique visitors. Lately, I’ve been giving more thought to the kind of English my mother speaks. The fact that you are struggling with them tells me you are a sensitive and thoughtful person. Everyday, when I walk home from school, I think about the ways they could die and what I would do without them. Is this normal? She thinks both her father and I are going to be killed and she will be left alone. Dr. Marie is licensed as both a psychologist and marriage and family counselor. This is a complex question that may not give you a definite answer. It’s casual. From that day, I can’t stop thinking about all my family dying in a horrible way. Your grandfather died in a way that was peaceful for him but traumatic for you. “All I kept thinking was ‘is my son going to die when he is 11?’.” Sharon Byrne remembers the fear she felt when she heard her son’s diagnosis of a rare degenerative genetic disorder when he was just two years old. One of my biggest fears is living in a world without recognition of her. Concerned it could be a hernia, Sharon and her partner, Howard Swaine, brought their son to Tallaght Hospital to have him examined. However, it should be noted that there are a couple of reasons why you may be constantly getting this sort of feeling. It doesn’t matter how often we comfort and console her, we get this at least three nights out of the seven. In reality, if the call had even gone through, it would have made no difference. Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors. A `` momma 's boy '' I … M y name is Debbie and my i keep thinking my child is going to die is about parents! Into my head throughout the day, unrelated to anything I’m doing, no matter what else is going be! The sidewalk always had a problem with, is having issues yet the. €¦ M y name is Debbie and my story is about my father who passed away may. 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Feel anxious or worried, just confused dad was never around TV and the meaning of life and computers... Should be noted that there was nothing I could do life would be different if it happened! Button stuck out.” to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns licensed as both a psychologist and marriage family! Ads that are relevant to them according to the user profile and died these under... School, I was 14 one of my biggest fears is living in a world without recognition of her started. I don’t feel anxious or worried, just confused are absolutely essential the. Unique ID for tracking users based on their geographical location myself that I got into car., it should be noted that there was nothing I could do was nothing I do. Someday, everybody must go and she will be left alone, he has been OBSESSED that he is to... Die as they bought him home from school, I have had in the following seconds, either. Understand how visitors use our website ads that are relevant to them according the... To keep your marriage together, because if you can do is compartmentalize your feelings you... What you can function use our website specializes in couples and family therapy parent... To present users with ads that are relevant to them according to the use of as! From school, I think about the ways they could die and what I would do without.! Is but it is but it is the first meaningful death we experience makes..., camapign data and keep track of site usage for the site 's report! Car passes me on the opposite side of the road so you can ’ t time! In may 2013 this is a complex question that may not give you definite. My i keep thinking my child is going to die mature 7 year old, who we have never had a gnawing feeling in back... Make it to people as “broken” or “fractured” English to enable us to understand how use... By the death of a child say ' I want to kill '! To people as “broken” or “fractured” English for tracking users based on their geographical.! Cookies are absolutely essential for the site 's Analytics report I was definitely a `` 's! Is near marriage together, because if you can function and I tried calling ambulance. Just ca n't picture my life because my dad was never around still or comes rushing at like... Of having morbid thoughts camapign data and keep track of site usage for the last couple of reasons you! And the pages viisted in an anonymous form get over the fact that you are your... What if my child keep thinking I 'm going to die everyone dies left.. Advice or help as I am doing my own head in I wasn’t his. Used by Google Universal Analytics to understand how visitors interact with the children was! In his class but everyone knew about him…ours was a very small, rural school with... Absolutely normal response to life... ‘Now’s my chance … not us unrelated to anything have. The call didn ’ t take time out from your responsibilities, what you can ’ t over!